Sunday, 5 June 2016

The Boot Camp

The Boot Camp
May 2016

During a recent BUPA medical the doctor patiently explained that although I am healthy I am not very fit,and this could be corrected by some concerted time in the gym. I politely heard him out and then explained just how tedious I find gyms and how and attempts to get fitter will just have to be achieved without recourse to treadmill hell. Or put another way, I have vowed never to darken the doors of such an establishment again.

The Boot Camp

So here I am in St Lucia staying at a resort called The Body Holiday surrounded by very fit looking types resplendent in lashings of lycra. Hey, there are even a bunch of then that run up and down the beach at 7.00am dragging car tyres behind them - madness!

This resort's USB is its health dimension and its strap line is "give us your body for a week and we will give you back your mind". 

So, given my above position what on earth are we doing here? Well, it's a friends 60th birthday this week and we are here, with their family, to celebrate. The resort, at its core, is a really nice all inclusive Caribbean beach hotel but with an added range if activities, therapies and healthy food to appeal to the body conscious brigade. As our hosts children and their partners are all hyper active this place offers wall to wall activities which goes down a storm.

The rest of the guests come to pay a visit

As you can imagine, you don't find me taking part on the Boot Camp schedule, or just about any other schedule now I come to think about it. Apart from the food stops (all very healthy) my personal schedule tends to include a couple of hours out on a cameraman,  whizzing out in the trade winds beyond the bay and a daily visit to the therapy centre where I indulge in a new found but massively sedentary pleasure of a full body massage.

"Our gang"

Of course, in addition to the regime of fitness and well being there are a number of "interesting" alternative therapies. Perhaps the finest was the Dosha Consultation which starts with a bizzare questionnaire which, among other things, asks if I am A. tall, B. short, or C. sometime tall and short! Based on the questionnaire I have three aspects of my life considered and action is suggested to bring them into balance. When have I ever been balanced? The questionnaire is followed by a consultation where the remedies (which all need to be paid for) are laid out. You would really be proud of me - I smiled, nodded.... and refrained from saying the word "bollocks" till we were a good 10 paces outside the door.

Sunset starts

Of course, the real medicine of this place is its laid back vibe and it is never more potent than at sunset when you can site at the main bar watching the sun set in a blaze of golden glory. Last night the resort were doing work on the beach with some JCBs and persuaded 80% of the guests to have a sunset cruise. In the event we stayed behind giving maybe 50 of us the run of the site and we witnessed possibly the finest sunset I have seen.

Going down in a blaze of glory

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