Standedge Tunnel

Standedge Tunnel
21st February 2009

My reliable sources tell me that when Standedge Tunnel reopens next month, it will do so for three days each week - Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. That will be a big step forward from the Wednesday and Friday options which have prevailed to date, and should stimulate additional traffic on this under used waterway.

What my sources are less clear about is the means of passage. I was expecting the electric tugs to be withdrawn in favour of a skippered solution, but it seems that this has yet to be decided.

A decision is due imminently, apparently. Watch this space....... I will let you know when I hear more.

Capt A

Mr Propeller OBE

Propeller
20th February 2009

The Queen routinely bestows honours on her faithful subjects, sometimes the rich and famous but at other times on the more lowly and unrecognised members of society. It's this second category that attracts my attention, unsung local heros or faceless civil servants who have delivered over and above the call of duty, people like Dame Shiriti Vadera, now infamous for her widely reported but misunderstood "green shoots of recovery" comment.

I may not be the Queen, but I would like to award an honour - to the propeller of Wand'ring Bark. It sits down there in the murk and the gloom year after year, springing into action at a moments notice, and withstanding all sorts of abuse as it has it's close encounters with canal bed debris. It's truly remarkable that it survives at all, and yet without it I couldn't move a single inch.

Not all propellers survive unscathed. Here's a picture of The Robber Button's after a really close encounter with submerged masonry:

Ouch - that's got to have hurt!

In truth, I have never actually seen Wand'ring Bark's prop. It replaced a smaller one which was taken off a couple of years ago when WB was out of the water for blacking. However, I feel I maintain an intimate relationship with the current incumbent of my propshaft, having spent many hours with my arms wrapped around its three blades, cleaning off a broad assortment of detritus (mainly from the BCN).

So there you have it - a reasoned rationale for awarding an honour on my unglamorous but indispensable propeller.

Why did I change it? Well, the old 16 x 11 unit caused the engine to over rev and a reasonable cruising speed could only be maintained with an engine speed of over 2000 rpm. The new prop is a 17 x 12 which dropped the revs to 1600, reducing engine wear, fuel consumption and associated noise levels. It also gave WB a better top speed which came in handy when we punched the flood current on the Trent last Easter.

For the technically minded the first dimension refers to the diameter of the prop (in inches - none of this metric nonsense) and the second refers to the pitch, which is best imagined as the forward travel of the prop in one revolution when submerged in a tank of soft butter! As with other things in life, size does matter and an extra inch here and there can deliver significant added satisfaction....

My old prop remains perfectly serviceable and is currently sitting in my garage going nowhere. If you could use it, it's yours for £50, but you will have to collect it from Birmingham cos it weighs a ton.

On the subject of surplus boating bits and bobs, I noticed that Mortimer Bones had a basin going begging and it made me think that lot's of boaters must have old stuff lying around, which could usefully be recycled if only a good home could be identified. If you have any boat related stuff cluttering up your shed that you want to get rid of, let me know and I will post a photo and description of it on a new "Captn Ahabs Marine Mart" page. That's my bit for a greener recycled Britain.

Fag Packet Engineering

Fag Packet Engineering
18th February 2009

For many years I have worked closely with the Midlands engineering industry and have come to the startling conclusion that it's demise has a direct correlation with smoking.

Let me explain. The foundations of the UK's manufacturing industry were laid by back street engineers, who designed the engines that drove the industrial revolution largely by rule of thumb.

You don't have to look any further than our esteemed Mr Brindley to see what I mean. Here was a man of humble origins and limited training, who masterminded and designed an integrated communication system that turned the UK upside down, setting us on a path that would lead to world domination in trade and commerce. Did he have an MBA in Applied Transportation and the support of a high capacity laptop loaded with the latest versions of Microsoft Project, Critical Path spreadsheets and Visio process mapping? I don't think so! No, Mr Brindley managed to realise his Grand Cross vision from the back of a proverbial fag packet.


The recent transition to a largely non smoking nation has deprived an entire generation of engineers of their most vital support tool:

No smokers = no cigarettes
No cigarettes = no fag packets
No fag packets = nowhere to record those transient moments if brilliance

QED: The demise of smoking and the collapse of Industrial Britain are inextricably linked.

So, as recession teeters on the brink of depression, what are we to do? I could argue that the Government should do everything in it's power to restore the fortunes of the tobacco industry, but that is probably unnecessary. What we need is the innovation made possible by the humble fag packet, not the associated lung cancer - which would kill off the innovative spirit we are trying to encourage. No, all we need are the fag packets themselves. Come to think of it, we don't even need the packets, just the backs.

My suggestion is therefore simple. Pads of "virtual fag packets" should be produced under license from Players, and then distributed to every able bodied man and woman across the length and breadth of Britain. Armed with this essential tool, all those millions of bright ideas will be captured and developed, returning our once great nation to the forefront of innovation and economic prosperity.

Just a thought.

NB. On reflection, I can see a small but significant historical hole in my argument. Mr Brindley undertook most of his canal building endeavours in the mid to late 1700's, and certainly before his untimely death in 1772. Cigarettes, on the other hand, did not become generally available in the UK till after the Crimean War (1853/1856) placing the trusty fag packet beyond his figurative grasp by about 100 years.

However, I don't see why a small technicality like that should stand in the way of a good story!

Which! Waterways Guide

Waterways Guides 16th February 2009

Life was so much simpler in Henry Ford's day. Back then, if you wanted a car, you could have it in any colour you wanted - just so long as it was black.

With a hint of spring in the air it's time to turn my attention to the first proper boat trip of 2009. I have two weeks of holiday booked before Easter and a relief crew scheduled up to bring Wand'ring Bark back from wherever we end up. That means that the inland waterways world really is our oyster.

Last year we travelled east, all the way to Boston (see my earlier blog entries for an account of our travels on an "in flood" Trent), but this year I think it's time for something completely different. I am thinking about Manchester and the Pennines, maybe taking in the Standedge Tunnel and the Rochdale as well if the weir on the Calder and Hebble has been fixed. It will be mean a lot of locks but Jeff will be with me and he seems up for the challenge.

So, I have been turning to my guide books and considering my options, but that presents a dilemma before I even start. Which guide book do I use?


My heart takes me to my trusty Pearson. I think I must have got the full set and I am very attached to the slightly whimsical format. Whilst they are now produced in glorious technicolour they have their roots in the black and white (also black and blue?) versions I remember from by youth in the late 1960's.


I love their complete focus on the waterways themselves and the interesting commentary which accompanies them. However, try using them when you stray off the waterways and they are as much use as a rubber nail.


That takes me to the Nicholson series. These guides present the waterways in a very different format, displaying the route in the context of a "proper" map, complete with contours, footpaths, railways and everything, stretching out for a couple of miles on either side. At first glance this is a big plus as it allows you to see how the waterway relates to its surroundings, and helps me reach local facilities with reasonable confidence.


However, they lack the "soul" of Pearsons and don't quite capture the "personality" of the route the same way. Whats more, all the waterways are listed in strict alphabetical order, which can be irritating. There you are cruising to the eastern end of the Leeds Liverpool canal and, hey presto, you turn the page only to find yourself in Kidsgrove - just because alphabetically the Macclesfield Canal follows Leeds Liverpool.

Pearson seems to flow more instinctively - if you know what I mean!

So there you have it - a dilemma before I even start. Which guide should I use?
The answer is obvious really - use both. I plan my journeys using Nicholson and cruise in the company of Messrs Pearson and Son, thus getting the best of both worlds. It costs a bit more, but whats a tenner in the grand scheme of things.

As with politics, there is a third way - the Waterways World Series - but they don't seem to hit the spot on any level, so are probably best forgotten!

Maybe choice is a good thing after all.

The collapsing cratch

The collapsing cratch
15th Feb 2009

My last entry made reference to my home made collapsing cratch plate and, given the interest in my boating DIY projects, I thought I would take a look at how I made it.


I think that I should point out that one of the greatest loves of my life (apart from Belle of course - thanks for a lovely Valentines day!) is my carpentry. I have been a wood junkie ever since my dad let me start to use / wreck his tools when I was about 6 or 7 - and the scope to do woodwork at Secondary school was a major factor in the planned failure of my 11 plus. As a result I have a well equipped carpentry workshop, and having the right tools makes a big difference to the end results.

So the brief was a cratch that was aesthetically pleasing (no sticking up bits for extra headroom), a glazed front to allow light in and to facilitate a forward view from the cabin and finally it had to be collapsible, so the whole assembly can be removed in nice weather, maximising the usable space in the restricted well deck.

As with any building project, one starts with the foundations. How to attach the cratch to the boat? The front of the well deck has a raised lip so I fashioned an "L" shaped bit of wood which fitted snugly across the top and against the front edge, shaping the ends to match the contours of the boat. I then a made a couple of shaped plates which could be hooked under the gunnels and then screwed into the top plank. The whole thing was then painted up to final gloss coat and fitted to the boat using exterior grab adhesive. This gave me a neat base for the cratch plate itself, and was attached to the boat without having to drill any holes in the metal.


Next came the central front post and top board. It was important to get the lines looking right so the dimensions were worked out by laying the boat pole partially over the well deck to get a height that is consistent with the height of the cabin roof. I then using a set square to get a 90 degree angle up from the foredeck. The foredeck slopes back a bit so this means I ended up with a slight backwards rake, which avoids the rather startled "sit up and beg" look which is often seen.


The top board is a simple pine plank hinged at the rear onto a wooden base plate made from some surplus hardwood work surface. This base plate has some runners attached to reflect the curve of the cabin roof and then attached from under the overhang using four non rusting brass screws. Because the cratch carries the tunnel light I needed to provide a power source. This was carried from the cabin into the mounting block, round the back of the hinge and along the top of the plank. As these sections move the wiring is vulnerable, so heavy duty multicore cabling was used (the yellow sort used on building sites and demanded by the BSC) and this was channeled into a groove routed into the top of the board. It was then fixed onto the groove using silicon and capped off with a thin strip of wood.

The front post was made by laminating (a posh expression for fixing together) two planks. I used a wider, thinner one at he back and a thicker, narrower thicker one for the bit on show at the front. This created a natural rebate for the glazed sections to sit into. To get a flush finish I used exactly the same thickness of timber for the front post and the frames of the glazed sections.


Because it all had to collapse, I cut the post about 2/3rds of the way up and put a hinge on the bottom. This allows the lower part to fold back down and hang flush with the front of the well deck. The top section was then hinged onto the top plank and the light attached to the front. I wanted the two bits to locate back together accurately so I created a rebate using the two bits of timber used in its construction, and added a couple of dowel prongs (male) in the top which fit neatly into two holes drilled in the the base the top bit (female). The pictures will make sense of this explanation!

So now we have a base plate attached to the front deck, the hinged top plank fixed to the cabin roof and the splittable front post connecting the two together, also carrying the tunnel light. You may be thinking "so what does he use for a tunnel light when its all collapsed?". A good question and an easy one to answer. If I need to pass through a tunnel with the cratch removed I simply flip the top plate back over and the top section of the front post drops down, complete with the light.


So that leaves the triangular window sections, possibly the trickiest bit of the job. With the base plate and front posts all working together I measured the width and height and cut the square profile timber to length. N.b. Always make the rule (the vertical bit) go the full length from top to bottom or you will encourage rot where it joins the stile (the horizontal bit). With the two bits of wood lined up on the bench you can find out how long the other side is (the hypotenuse if you remember your maths from school). The three sections are then fixed to each other using simple mortice and tennon joints, glued and screwed through.

To get a nice clean finish I then planed off the leading edge of the "hypotenuses" to conform to the lines of the boat, and provide a good point of attachment for the cratch cover. With the whole window frame fixed together I then routed a rebate in from the front and, after painting the frames, I had my local glazier cut some toughened glass to fit. This was bedded into silicone and held into the rebate with some pre painted square strips of timber, with one corner rounded off.

Finally, the windows needed attaching to the base plate and the front post securely, but in a way that was easy to remove. This was achieved by inserting four dowel pegs into the upright which corresponded with holes drilled on the the post. This has the effect of locking the windows in and stiffening the front post back into a solid unit. The bottom stile sits with is rear edge against a rebate attached to the base plate. Its important to make sure the glazed sections and the base plate don't sit in a puddle of water, so I created a gap by making them rest on a couple of L shaped angle brackets, which lift then up by 3mm and also prevents them sliding forward. I also drilled a hole in the base rail to line up with the outer angle bracket into which I inserted a long and well oiled bolt with a wing nut holding it in place from inside.


The last stage was to decorate it, which was achieved using the traditional harlequin design in colours used elsewhere on the boat plus a powder blue.

The big questions have to be:

Q. Does it work?
A. Yes - like a dream.

Q. How long does it take to disassemble / put back together?
A. About five minutes.

Q. How much did it cost?
A. About £60

Timber £15
Hinges (2) £3
Light Recycled from previous location
Wiring £5
Glass £35
Paint Used left overs


But it's not about the money.

As I said at the start, I an a wood junkie with PVA adhesive flowing through my veins. It's about the challenge of the task, the planning and problem solving, the making do with bits and bobs saved from previous jobs, its about sawdust in my hair and playing with my toys in the shed. Maybe you can now understand why I like Fred Dibnah!